A few years ago, one of my cosplay friends (let’s call him Rei) was invited to a house party after a small, local convention. He went to the party and it was all good until Rei ended up doing something which was considered “socially awkward.” The response? The party host made a huge public shaming post on Facebook about Rei – roasting him about what he did at the party and generally how creepy he was.
Not only did the party attendees started talking shit about Rei afterward, other people who weren’t even there or had an idea of he was, started talking bad about him. It was really sad to see everyone gang up on Rei; I met him a few years ago and know he’s actually a good person. When I saw him at conventions, I could tell it affected him negatively for months. Sure, he’s kind of socially awkward and didn’t know any better. But did he deserve to get publicly lynched for it? Definitely not, in my opinion. All because he made one little mistake at a party.
There’s been a bunch of these “callout” posts I’m seeing on Facebook lately similar to what happened to Rei. They’re the type of posts that call out certain individuals in the cosplay community. Whether it’s warning people about a “creepy” photographer or alerting others about someone’s racist behaviours, I noticed they’ve been popping up more often in the community.
I can’t say if this trend is good or bad.
On one hand, in a community full of creepy and potentially dangerous people, being aware of specific individuals is a great way to protect each other. Especially when you consider that many in the cosplay community are afraid to speak up about someone. In fact, some of these creepers tactfully stay under the radar with their bad behavior until a bunch of cosplayers group together and find out that person’s pattern of abuse. They don’t even know they’re being bullied or mistreated until someone else has the courage to speak up about that individual. So these public shaming posts can bring good for the community by calling out certain individuals and their manipulative ways. They also stop the behaviours that are contrary to the community’s beliefs such as racism and homophobia.
On the other hand, public shaming has serious consequences for both the people who make the posts, and the “accused.” Remember the Salem Witch Trials, where a bunch of women in the late 1600s were executed because they were accused of using “witchcraft?” False accusations, mob mentality and hysteria led to these innocent women being killed.
These public shaming posts in the community and the Witch Trials are not all that different; there’s a mob mentality when someone is shamed on Facebook. In the court of public opinion, the accused is almost always guilty. And while there is merit to calling out bad people in the community, it would be ignorant to say they’re all guilty. How do you know the person is telling the truth? What if the facts are exaggerated, or based on assumptions? What if this person has a vendetta against the accused? On Facebook, there is no fair trial for someone being shamed upon. Based on what I’ve seen, if someone posts about you in the cosplay community, your reputation is done. That in itself is VERY dangerous.
Last month, I made a quick post in my cosplay group, asking how the local convention was. One cosplayer was upset with a volunteer at the convention. She claimed that the volunteer was extremely rude and couldn’t do his job properly. All of a sudden, a bunch of other members started criticizing the volunteer as well. While I didn’t think much of it at the time, someone ended up messaging me, asking me to delete the comments because they were ganging up on a teenager just trying to do his best. I agreed, and decided to delete the comments and told them all to send their criticisms to the convention organizers.
Another incident involved a photographer who was being harassed and stalked by a teenager. The photographer made a post, warning everyone about the teenager. The Facebook post snowballed into a mountain of comments that criticized the teenager’s bad behavior at conventions. While the photographer did well by warning everyone, at the same time it condemned the teenager and left him with no room for correcting his mistakes.
That’s what I worry about with these public shaming posts in the cosplay community; while good in nature, can have serious consequences. All it takes is one bad post to ruin someone’s reputation AND livelihood for good. I’ve heard of a couple cases where the accused took their own lives after being shamed online.
Not to mention that the person making these public shaming posts in the cosplay community can get into legal trouble; you can definitely get sued for defamation. The problem is we are treating it more like high school gossip, and less about PUBLICLY sharing your views to everyone in the community.
What’s the solution/alternative to callout posts?
I’m not sure how to deal with this. There’s no easy answer. As noted earlier, I myself have had to take action when someone publicly shamed another in my Cosplay Hangout Group. And I feel like I don’t win with any choice I make.
There’s a need to protect the vulnerable in the cosplay community, and give a voice for those who are unable to. At the same time, these shaming posts are also a dangerous tool that if we don’t address soon, will lead to negative consequences.
What do you guys think of callout posts in the cosplay community? Let me know in the comments.
These “callout posts” don’t come from nowhere. There’s a damn good reason why they’re made.
It is best to get multiple perspectives on a situation, but if enough people are saying to watch out for a certain man, then it’s not unwarranted. There are some truly fucked up people in the community and an effort must be made to make it safer.
If I spread a rumor about someone, and 5 people believed it. And then those 5 people posted about that rumour…does it make it true?
I’m not saying every callout post is like that. But having multiple people posting it does not always make it true.
If you spread a rumor about someone, and some people believe it, then they’re likely just gonna take your word for it. In your example it’s just you talking about one person.
But if more than one person, maybe even a dozen, are saying to watch out for a certain individual… then that’s a little more difficult to debunk. True or not, believe it or not, the fact remains that multiple people are wary, or even scared about a certain person. And so it’d be on the rest of us to also be wary and protect those who are vulnerable.
As for the accused in question? If enough people are speaking up about them, then they need to do a lot to make up for the accusations against them. It just might not even be possible or feasible.
This just seems like an immature way to confront someone. People call out politicians or other people in power but that’s usually accompanied with hard facts. When a stranger gives a testomony about a “creepy” person you usually need to be careful when believing them. Which i guess most of these callout posts rely on to make their claims. The cosplay community is filled with an insecure crowd so getting them to believe a rumour or raise pitchforks is usually not that hard. If you use enough emotions in a post you can manipulate a mob.
Now if you don’t like a person that’s fine too but don’t make a big deal about it. If someone does something creepy call them out on it but give them a chance to defend themselves. Dont publically shame them without getting to know their responses. The Internet is especially the worst place to do that. People will believe anything if it’s in writing. There are many people who are ready to send hate mail or death threats when given a target that deserves it. Confront these creeps in person if you can that’s how adults act. If they did anything illegal call the authorities.
I agree with what you’re saying! It’s very easy to manipulate people into believing you, and that is my concern with these callout posts. It would be naive to say all callout posts are done with good intentions.
Call out posts ARE done with good intentions though. If you’re trying to get people to watch out for a suspicious or creepy individual, how is that not good intent?
It would be even more naive to believe that these call out posts are done without good reason. There are some creepy men out there that need to be brought to light for the sake of everyone else’s safety.
You could say that a lot of callout posts have good intentions. But I think it’s unrealistic to say ALL of them have good purposes. They can be used for malicious intents.
For example, what if I was a famous cosplayer, and I was jealous of another cosplayer who was rising to fame? I could be an asshole and start making up shit like how they’re a “bully” or how “creepy” they are. Not only could I get my friends to spread that false rumour, if I made a callout post, a lot of people would believe my bullshit because I’m a famous cosplayer. I not only have the power to bring someone down, but also ruin their reputation.
See how easy it is to use callout posts for bad intentions? My point is, callout posts can be HELPFUL to someone, but they can also DESTROY someone as well.
It’d be also just as unrealistic to say they all have bad purposes. Also, sometimes people need to be destroyed, especially if they actually ARE harmful to others. It does depend on the post in question and the magnitude of it.
Again, if you were making stuff up about someone and you got your friends to believe it, there’s a bias there, of course they’d believe you. But then friends of the person you’re accusing, as well as neutral parties, might not be so convinced. It’d be on them to judge for themselves, maybe even defend them or have the accused defend themselves. For every accusation against the guilty party, there should be enough defense for them if they want to clear their name.
But if enough people have come forward about a creep or someone who has actually caused harm to others… it’d take a lot of defense and a lot of doing for the one accused to try and clear their name. Especially with enough people against them. At that point, why doubt them? It’d be naive to believe that people wouldn’t do this without good reason, again, especially when it comes to matters of harassment.
It is important to make sure that the facts are brought up, but when it comes to serious matters and you have doubts about the victims rather than lambasting the actual harasser, you don’t make yourself look good.
I see what you’re saying. The facts definitely need to be there before a callout post is made.
I’m glad to have made this blog post to highlight the pros and cons of callout posts.
Hi Roger, this was a great post in my opinion and very much needed.
People can be SO FAST to call someone out or talk bad about someone without trying to see from a different perspective. In the case of your friend Rei, I’ll take your word that he made an honest social faux-pas. He was so quick to be publically shamed without even been given a chance to speak for himself. He did not intend to harm, and yet was treated like a witch. From your story, my opinion is that this party host should have pulled him aside and spoken to him. The problem could’ve been solved right there.
On another hand, there are those cases when people truly deserve to be called out because they’ve knowingly caused harm to others.
I believe that before someone is called out, we need to be clear what their INTENTIONS were. Did they make an honest mistake? Not everyone is able to catch every single social cue (I certainly am not). Or were they actively trying to harm someone, or disregard their well-being. Then, who ever is getting called out for their behaviour needs to be given the chance to see why they were wrong and how they can do better. If someone is attacked online, shamed, and basically cyberbullied, the intention there is NOT to help them realize their mistake and grow. It’s to tear them down. That’s turning a problem into a bigger problem, not a solution.
But that begs the question what if we’re dealing with a person who behaved in a racist or homophobic manner and refused to see their mistakes despite people patiently explaining to them? What if we’re dealing with a repeat offender who cannot be reasoned with? Honestly, I don’t have an answer for that. But it’s not to fight hate with hate.
I’m generally a positive person, but the cynic in me believes that people love to hate.
You make some good points, Jin. I feel like a lot of callout posts could have been avoided if people were more assertive to each other and tried to work out their problems on their own.
I made this analogy up on the spot. Imagine you have a wild animal running around in your house. Instead of getting help or trying to get rid of the animal yourself, you set the house on fire to remove/kill it. That’s how I feel callout posts are like – setting the house on fire. It works, but is it really necessary? Maybe in some circumstances, you really need to. But it has devastating consequences.
And you’re right, some people love to fan the flames. That’s why callout posts can be used for the wrong reasons.
That’s a very accurate analogy for something you made up on the spot!
Without getting too philosophical, wherever there is power, there will be people who will abuse it.
I sincerely hope things are looking up for your friend. Rumours blow over with time, but once they are out there, they can’t be undone. It takes tremendous strength to rise up again after something like that, but I like to believe that people are stronger than they think.
Yep my friend is okay. It did affect him for a while, but he eventually recovered from it. Hopefully people will realize the power of callout posts and use them responsibly.